More than a 90-degree sign
Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate – Carl Jung
Every Saturday & Monday for the last 277 days my morning routine involves reflecting on this verse, “This child will be a sign that will be opposed, so that the inner thoughts of many will be revealed.” Although Simeon was speaking of Jesus, his words echo a truth we often encounter in life—especially in the world of coaching and psychology. Opposition, challenges, and resistance are not obstacles to be feared; instead, they are windows into our deeper selves.
A story about Sarah
Let me tell you a story about Sarah, a woman who felt stuck. On the surface, everything seemed fine. She had a stable job, a supportive family, and friends who cared for her. Yet, beneath this seemingly perfect life, Sarah felt restless. Something was off, but she couldn’t quite put her finger on it. That’s when she decided to reach out to a coach.
During their first meeting, Sarah was full of energy and ideas. She wanted to switch careers, learn new skills, and live a more fulfilling life. But as her coach asked deeper questions, Sarah hesitated. Each question peeled back a layer of her ambitions, exposing something she wasn’t ready to face—fear. She was afraid of failure, of what others might think, and, more profoundly, afraid of stepping outside the identity she had built over the years.
At that moment, Sarah found herself in the middle of what Simeon’s words had hinted at. Opposition. Resistance. The “sign” was there, but it wasn’t in the form of an external challenge. The real opposition came from within. Every time Sarah talked about her dreams, something inside her resisted. She wanted change, but another part of her was scared of it.
Her coach knew what this meant. This was no ordinary resistance—it was an opportunity. In psychology and coaching, resistance is often a doorway to something deeper. It’s like a fog that covers the truth, and only by walking through it can you see what lies on the other side. The coach gently guided Sarah to explore these fears. What was she truly afraid of? Why did she hesitate to pursue her dreams? As Sarah began to talk, her inner thoughts—those hidden beliefs and buried emotions—started to surface.
She realized she had been living according to other people’s expectations for so long that she’d forgotten what she truly wanted. The opposition she felt wasn’t just fear; it was a message from within, telling her that something needed to change. Her dreams were clashing with her old beliefs, and it was this clash that had created the resistance.
Sarah’s journey of self-discovery wasn’t easy. There were moments when she wanted to quit, to go back to the comfort of her old life. But her coach kept reminding her that opposition wasn’t a sign of failure. It was a sign that she was on the right path, that something within her was being revealed. Each session peeled away more layers, bringing her closer to her authentic self.
As Sarah grew more self-aware, she began to see the patterns that had been holding her back. She wasn’t afraid of failure, but of losing control. She wasn’t afraid of what others thought; she was afraid that stepping into her true self might disappoint them. These revelations were painful, but they were also liberating. The resistance she once feared became her greatest teacher.
In the end, Sarah didn’t just switch careers. She transformed her entire life. She made decisions based on what she truly valued, not what she thought others expected of her. The opposition that had once seemed overwhelming became a source of strength. It revealed her fears, her desires, and ultimately, her true self.
A sign is only useful if you pause and look at it
Excerpt from the book ‘Positive Provocation’ by Robert Biswas-Diener — At the risk of me bringing back memories of your high school geometry class, let’s review circles: there are 360 degrees in a circle. A 180-degree angle is a flat line and represents opposing line segments. In the social world, this angle is metaphor for the people who shoot you down, dismiss your ideas, refuse your requests, and hold opposing view. By contrast, the 0-degree angle is your own first-person perspective… engage them in new ways of thinking without completely pulling the rug out from under them is the 90-degree view.
Sarah’s story is not unique. Every coaching journey involves moments of resistance, where the client faces the opposition between who they are and who they want to become. But just as Simeon prophesied, opposition reveals what is hidden within. It brings to light the inner thoughts, beliefs, and fears that must be confronted for real change to happen.
In coaching, this opposition is a gift. It offers the opportunity to explore deeper layers of the self, uncovering truths that lead to transformation. And just like Sarah, anyone willing to face this opposition with courage and guidance can emerge on the other side, more self-aware and aligned with their true purpose.
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.” – Marianne Williamson
Meandrousity
The path to personal growth is rarely smooth. There will be opposition, both from the world and from within ourselves. But as Simeon’s words remind us, this opposition is necessary. It reveals our inner thoughts, guiding us to deeper self-awareness and transformation. Through coaching, individuals can navigate this journey with clarity, embracing the resistance that once held them back and using it as a tool for growth and fulfillment.